Family...

I've been spending most of the week with Jay's family... earlier in the week we went shopping; for food and clothes, then on Friday, we went swimming at the Cardiff International Pool (complete with four giant slides, rapids and a jacuzzi) and then yesterday, after shopping in Newport, we went to a family gathering barbeque at one of Jay's uncle's house. The uncle is getting married soon, so the barbeque was held as some sort of pre-wedding event.

I had an amazing time; they kept the dog away from me and I was able to grill my own chicken for the barbeque so getting around and enjoying the meal wasn't a problem. The whole afternoon was filled with laughter and merriment, but it did make me wonder why I hadn't always had much fun during barbeque events... not with my own family anyway.

Sometimes I think to myself why I had always been the one subject to the demands of the more elder members of the family; it was always me who had to be distributing things, ushering guests, setting the tables, washing the dishes; while some of my other cousins were able to relax and not have to stain their beautiful baju kurungs. True that I may not be the only one doing the work, but at least the cousins who were helping out at the event weren't being picked on all the time. My relatives never seem to let go the fact that I am fat; and they can never seem to accept that I like my course, and that I intend to pursue my studies further no matter what the cost. Because of these occurences happening ever so frequently whenever there is a family event on my part, I can never fully enjoy a barbeque, birthday party or even a wedding, 100%.

So when I was spending yesterday afternoon laughing, I wondered whether there were others who might experience the same things that I do during family events, or if  I was just unlucky to be born into a family that doesn't want me to be happy (maybe they just had a funny way of showing their love for me)...

Sometimes I wonder... whether it would be better for me to substitute my friends with my family... Because my friends seem to know me a lot better... and wouldn't try to offend me all the time.

Maybe my family is just trying to kick me out.